When “Oops” Is Not Enough

For we all stumble in many ways. And if anyone does not stumble in what he says, he is a perfect man, able also to bridle his whole body. James 3:2
I have never claimed to be a perfect man. Sometimes I stumble in ways that actually hurt others. Did you ever say something you shouldn’t have, and it hurt someone without your intent? I have.
Matter of fact, I just did last week.
Flip Wilson used to have his character “Geraldine” say “The Devil made me do it!” I really don’t want to give Ol’ Scratch too much credit. If he had a hand in it, so did I.
I’ve spent the intervening hours feeling bad about it and smacking myself in the forehead - which doesn’t help the one I offended. Nor does it help me, other than a renewed desire to more strongly discipline myself against future failures. I’ve played the scene over a few thousand times in my head, thinking of all the ways I could have had that conversation without wounding. There were quite a few, in fact. Many ways to bless, but out of my mouth came the opposite.
I usually keep a pretty close watch on what I say, but I have spent a lot of years loving “wise-cracks”, and sometimes they sneak out of mouth when I’m not being careful enough. There’s nothing “wise” about them, but they can - and do - cause cracks in relationships.
I’m not excusing, just explaining. I tell you the truth, if I could backtrack and stop myself from saying that stupid thing, I would. Next best thing is to keep a guard over my tongue to prevent future outrages. Did you know the tongue is the strongest muscle in the body? I thought you might.
The tongue is a fire, a world of evil. Placed among the parts of our bodies, the tongue contaminates the whole body and sets on fire the course of life, and is itself set on fire by hell. James 3:6
And then there’s this:
I tell you, on the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak, for by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned.” Matt 12:36-37
Oops is not enough. The power of words to harm is something God takes seriously - and He expects us to as well. I wish I had something clever or funny to say here, but I can’t think of anything. So, learn from my mistake. Use your words to build and heal, and not to wound. Aim for perfection in your conversation. You’ll be glad you did!

A Smart Woman Thought of That

“Many women are capable, but you surpass them all!” Prov 31:29
It’s kind of a family joke, every time we see some clever gadget we say, “I bet a smart woman thought of that." It’s because of my mother-in-law. She said it all the time, especially if it was something practical, functional, and pretty. There’s actually a pretty long list of things that are linked to a woman’s ingenuity - and probably an even longer list of things ostensibly invented by men but inspired by the women in their life. Here’s a few of the first kind.
Mary Anderson invented the windshield wiper in 1903. She was inspired by street car drivers who had to reach around and wipe their windshields with a rag. She soon patented a device they could mount on the roof and operate by hand from the inside. Imagine that, keeping dry while improving safety! Thanks, Mary.
And the next time you see a paper bag, remember Margaret Knight, who invented the machine that gives paper bags square bottoms in 1871. And while we re-use our little plastic bags in a lot of ways, there were a lot of uses for the paper ones that they just aren’t handy for, like covering school books and making kites and party hats - also designed by women.
I don’t want to leave out Ruth Wakefield, who in a happy accident invented chocolate chip cookies at the Toll House Inn. Let me just say, “Mmmm-mmm-MM!"
Then there was secretary Bette Nesmith Graham, who often had to retype whole pages because of one little typo. After watching some painters at work one day, she got the inspiration for Liquid Paper, getting a patent in 1956. Last time I checked, it was one of the more expensive fluids on the planet at $198 a gallon, and while it may end up going the way of the buggy whip, it was handy while it lasted.
And we could go on and on. Actress Hedy Lamar, who co-invented a wireless technology before WWII that is foundational to our modern cell phone, Stephanie Kwoleck, who invented Kevlar for bullet-proof vests, Marie Curie, whose work with radium led to many medical advances.
I happen to like smart women. I married one, fathered one, and owe my life to one, and owe a great debt to the mother of my wife, who is the inspiration of today’s column. She passed away unexpectedly January 3rd after a brief illness. She was not the kind of woman who wanted tearful accolades at her funeral, but she would want you to know one special thing about her that carried her through the crises of her life, her faith.
...Yet I am not ashamed, for I know him whom I have believed, and I am persuaded that he is able to guard that which I have committed to him against that day. 2 Tim 1:12
She carried that verse printed on a card in her wallet. It was a reminder to her that she was trusting in Someone who had her best interests at heart, and a word to us that we can know Him and trust Him, too. Learn from Jane, because she was a smart woman, and anyone she trusted deserved it.